We just want to be loved...in life - everyday we want acceptance. Sometimes we do things that we didn't think we would ever do just to get those feelings that come over you when you get that love and acceptance. Like we need some type of validation. We are human after all... But somehow we have to break that mold and learn that loving ourselves sometimes is enough....at the end of the day that is who will be with you --- you and God. We have to dig really deep sometimes just to try and figure out how to be content with who we are and where we are in life. I don't know when it finally happens or how it finally happens but eventually you get there....you get to the point of pure contentment that God loves you and that you ARE enough and that you are happy with what you have been blessed with because in reality, you may be far more blessed than others around you. I haven't always had a positive outlook on things and situations....but I've learned over the last year or so and tried to keep in mind that what I yearn for -- that I see what my friends have that someone out there is wanting something that I have and I needed to learn to be content and thankful in the moment because what I may be taking for granted, someone else is praying for daily. Gods grace and blessings come in due time - He knows the deepest parts of you and your heart and when He sees fit in what you so deserve, He alone can decide when, who, and what that is and it is ALWAYS better than what you prayed for...that I can promise you. I have been able to beautifully witness the Lord show up in others lives and my own and truly blessing beyond what my tiny heart prayed for.
Trusting God is one of the hardest things to do because we so want to be of the flesh and take control and that is just not how God works...you cannot learn from the One who is the teacher when you are trying to play the teacher yourself. My devotions lately have consisted of nothing but trusting God in the NOW and letting go of your anxiety and fears and thanking God for all the trials that you are going thru because He ultimately knows what is on the other side of all that fear, anxiety, wonder, worry, heartache, and pain. It is SO hard to just accept that and learn to rest in the peace of His word but somehow....not always instantly....but God always shows up and I always look back and wonder why did I ever worry in the first place...
Learn to let go....learn to stop and take a breath. When you are truly able to give God all that you are worrying about, peace will come over you.... I pray that for you. I see so much pain these days in so many people and so many bad things happening and making you question why... I don't know answers and I don't understand everything that God does but I do know that somehow He always has a plan and He never disappoints. I cannot think of a time in my life looking back that I have held a grudge or stayed angry with God over something not going my way because every time I look back I see how strongly God protected me from so many things... In the moment anger ensues and in the moment I was devastated - but relying on God is the only way I even made it thru to the other side and now.....almost daily..I am grateful. I forever am thankful for the paths my life has gone down... It has brought me here to this day... To this moment...to where I strive daily in my anger, sadness, confusion, anxiety.....to refocus and be thankful for those moments because they are continually shaping me for what greater good there lies ahead. Thanking God that the future me will appreciate the current moments I am living in. I'm thankful for my last year of going to therapy and learning things about myself I didn't know existed...digging deep and facing the good, bad, and the ugly...accepting it and loving myself anyways. learning to let go. Learning to love who I am and learning that I am stronger than my past...I am stronger than my fears...be vulnerable. Let go of control. Learning to be happy. Finally feeling content in who I am and where I am in life. Living and appreciating the moments. Learning that even tho I'm writing all this and being positive that I won't have a huge trial come up to test me.... Cannot live in a world that you constantly fear the jinx whenever you are feeling content. God doesn't operate that way so neither should we. :)
Trust me when I say YOU ARE good enough. You ARE loved. You ARE wanted. God WILL give you the desires of your heart. He is writing your story with your best interest in mind. He does have amazing plans for your life and He is ALWAYS there. Trust. Love. Live. Breathe. Be content. Be happy. Be you. ❤️
