Ok so... this may not be news to most of you, but I soooo need anger management. I need a better outlook on life. I need to stop being so negative. I need to be more thankful. I need to be more gracious, more understanding. I need to not be jealous. I need to not be selfish. I need to stop being so quick to anger. I need to stop assuming. I need to learn contentment and peace. I need to learn how to love....be happy for people.
AHHHH!!!! I'm so fed up with myself! I'm tired of letting others define who I am, guilt trip me into being somebody and doing things I DO NOT WANT TO DO! No one else does it for you, so why should I? I'm tired of playing the games and just being "convenient" for other people. I'm not a doormat, I am not your tissue rag, I am NOT your last resort.
I let things just build up, and keep building until they explode and I embarrass myself. I need to learn how to keep myself in check and not let things get to me so badly like they do. People are just looking out for number one, they do not care about you or your issues or your anything unless it is convenient or benefiting them.
I, too, am like this for other people... I try not to be. However, I just always jump to conclusion and feel like I use people for my benefit - i don't want to... its how our sinful nature is. We let it win.
I struggle to wonder if there is any good in the world. I let all the people who don't really matter control and define how I look at myself. I should not! Who is the person who says I am or am not pretty? I am or am not fat? I am or am not stupid? I talk to much? I'm annoying?
Nobody.... you are supposed to define yourself in Christ.... we fall so short of that and just get preoccupied with how others view us and then we BELIEVE it! Oh how sad.
No entiendo porque estamos creendo en las cosas que no tienen significa en este vida!
Oh how good it feels to vent. :) I wish I could be such more of a positive, genuine person. I don't like or take joy in hurting peoples feelings, or being jealous... I wish I could be genuine and happy and thankful for people and things. God is so holy and gracious to me, why is it so difficult for me?
I hate having a bad attitude.. nobody likes anyone with a bad 'tude. I don't. ... I don't even like myself when I am like that. Gahh i'm a brat. :)
BUTTTT... In God's eyes i'm beautiful, i'm not perfect and He loves that... He uses moments like these to mold us and make us into His image - especially when we fall so short and so far from that.... like me... like I did.. today, yesterday, and heck.. the last 24yrs of my life! I'm tired of riding the negative nancy train....
But, someone brought an amazing new perspective into my life today.. we shall call him (venti black eye :)!!!) that God only made ONE of us. Out of billions of people he only made ONE OF ME! And one of me to love someone just like me.. how I feel, etc. What a concept.
So try to love yourself so you can love others the way GOD loves you and loves them too.
No comments:
Post a Comment